Sale Stalker: Boxing Day Action Plan, Selfridges et al

Post Harvey Nicks last year, look at that HUGE smile, I also bought that enormous Maui bangle that day...which I now can't find :(

Today is the day, kiddies. Christmas gifts have been unwrapped, transportation is somewhat up and running again...It's Boxing Day, bitches, and even though I don't know what that actually means in terms of British Heritage, I do know the most important thing which said holiday denotes, the kick off of SALE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Selfridges Givenchy Hobo Bag White was £845 now £422

Now, unlike back home (with the one notable exception of the post-Lehman era being this year), the Europeans with their regulated retail, would only go to sale twice yearly, post-Christmas and mid-summer. And whilst the recession has forced many stores to whip out the red pens earlier than they'd like, there still is no sale like the day after Christmas sale, and that's that.

Selfridges Dries Van Noten twist check dress was £675, up to 70% off

So here's my plan of attack for the day, or rather the sales in general. Premature ejaculation is crucial to avoid, hence why I'm sitting here blogging instead of fighting alongside the masses on Oxford Street. Like a streamlined shopping machine, I look to patience, and am content to wait, coiled and ready to strike. If one enters the madness at the crack of dawn, you're bound to find some sort of out of this world gem that you simply cannot resist (i.e. the one quilted Chanel bag to go on sale EVER in the history of the house), and so, instead of the £1000 budgeted for the whole of sale shopping, you blow 2K on one item and are done at 9:10 AM Boxing Day morning. Like I said, premature ejaculation, and that's no fun for anyone. Sale shopping is more a tantric test of stamina, of patience, of rolling the dice and taking a chance that by leaving an item for the time being, you'll come back in a few days to find it further market down...that sort of thing. It's all about the intuition.

Selfridges Alexander Wang Anya shoe boot in white was £640 now £319

Department stores always have to be destination number one, and in the case of London, I would always recommend that one head first to Selfridges, where you'll find the likes of McQueen, Dries, Philip Lim, Stella and more for up to 75% off. Selfridges sales gets the most hype, slashes prices the deepest earliest, so it should always be target numero uno. Head to womenswear designer floor, avoiding the denim section, and grab grab grab. Sweaters and coats, outerwear, the sorts of things that would make the best big Christmas gifts are the things to seek out first. Little trinkets here and there will come to you in the meantime.

Liberty ought to be stop number two. Smaller than its Brompton Road competitors, Liberty's stock is more likely to run out in the early days and its pickings a bit more high brow to the fashionista in the know. That is, racks of Richard Nicoll, Opening Ceremony, Peter Pilotto and more at 50% off won't go as quickly as half priced DVF over at Selfridges, but they will be the primary targets of the those in industry know-how. So depending what you're looking for, keep Liberty's relatively high on the agenda.

Selfridges Preen Grey Dress was £265 up to 30% off

Day two can be for Harrods and Harvey Nicks. I actually only usually briefly hit Harrods, and with only one goal in mind: Louboutins, Louboutins, Louboutins. And this is how you find them. Forget the hoards of shoppers staring at you as if you're totally bonkers, screw em, get down on all fours and CRAWL beneath the racks of sale shoes. Ignore size, color, pretty much everything, but where you see a flash of red sole, GRAB GRAB GRAB. You may look like some sort of wolverine fashion predator, but when all's said and done, you'll be the envy of all other Harrods-goers as you sit atop your amassed pile of Christian Louboutins, leisurely picking through the pile to find your size and style of choice. Game, Louboutin.

Selfridges Christian Louboutin studded clutch was £945 now £472

Harvey Nicks. I never shop there unless it's sale time for some reason. With Harvey's I found that the trick is to locate that section of miscellaneous racks on each floor where the items marked more than 50% off and assorted brands are crammed into one goldmine of a sale rack. Keep returning every couple of days until the bitter end, as that roulette rack pretty much churns out a winner or two every visit.

So that's all for now, kiddies. Am off to practice what I preach. Should you happen to see an American kicking and screaming being dragged away for deportation by the authorities after hand to hand combat with another shopper over who saw that pair of zip Balenciaga boots first...can someone please promise to look after Butters?